There are plenty of examples of people who have overcome all sorts of hardships and obstacles to achieve what they have wanted to achieve albeit at a much advanced stage of life. I may be one of them.
Whilst there’s the opinion some hold to say, “What’s the point now?”, I know that life has taught me never to give up. Even if my dream is one of the last things I ever manage to do. As long as I have life, I have breath. And as long as I have breath, I have hope. Perhaps it’s an unashamed tenacity that quietly feeds my dreams. Whatever it may be, I’m glad it’s there because it’s the fuel that keeps propelling me forward. Whether I move in short bursts of action or large continuous strides, is not the point. The main thing is that I am moving.
With that in mind, I can now confirm that I am planning to go to Bosnia next month on a charity mission. This type of work has always been my lifelong dream. When my former role in the last charity I was involved with came to an abrupt end, I vowed I would keep searching for a new alternative. Alhamdulillah, an opportunity recently presented itself and the time was ripe for me to grasp it. I am excited yet nervous. The trip will only be for a few days but I hope its impact on me will a longlasting positive one, inshaAllah.
It needs to be said that, as a mother, I would not – and could not – ever take my finger off the pulse when it comes to what my sons are doing in their lives. I look forward to seeing them progress through life and achieving new goals all the time. However, I also realise that my own life is full of aspirations still and these should not be compromised wherever possible. I have reached a point where I can put myself first for a change and not feel guilty for doing so. Like so many women out there, I sacrificed the middle years of my life on a seemingly permanent ‘standby’ mode whilst busying myself in raising my family. No regrets there and it is a task for which the joy and reward are indescribable. But that phase of waiting for ‘my time’ has now passed and I can finally put thoughts into action.
InshaAllah, this upcoming mission to Bosnia will be the harbinger of change for me and a reassurance to myself that I still have something to offer the world, however modest that contribution may be. I know I am not indispensable; I don’t suffer delusions of grandeur on that score. But I want my life to have a greater richness other than just paying bills and surviving. I want to continue reaching into the depths of my soul and find material there that will take me closer to Allah with each step.
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