In the quest to keep moving forward and try to squeeze what I can out of life, I have very recently taken on a new challenge. The title of this blog post might provide a huge hint!
My new adventure – learning Spanish.
I never got the opportunity to study a foreign language at school as, together with my family, we had moved abroad and so I missed some of my education in the UK. However, I don’t lament that loss because in moving to Bangladesh as a child, I actually became more proficient in Bengali, the first language of my parents. My mother had already taught us the basics of the language in terms of reading and writing, so that by the time we had moved to Dhaka, I felt learning the language there was a natural continuum. So, to say that I didn’t learn a second language at all is actually specious. I did and I am grateful that I can still communicate in all its forms today.
Now that I have a bit more leisure time on my hands, I feel it is convenient to learn new skills; to make up for some things I didn’t get the chance to do when younger. I don’t believe in fads and would not delve into something if I was not serious. So, I hope my enthusiasm will not fade over time. Learning Spanish is not because of my infatuation with Spain after my Malaga holiday. It is more about asking myself, “Why would I not consider myself to have the capability of learning a completely new skill at this late stage of my life?” I have lived enough of a life believing in “I can’t” rather than acknowledging deep down it was more of a case of “I can if I care enough to try.” Therefore, I am going to try my best to dismantle all the self-destroying barriers I have put before me for too long.
When it comes to learning a new language, I actually believe that being fluent in a second or even third language places someone at an advantage. In my own experience, I notice how I am more adept to making and listening to sounds in other languages that require different pronunciations, tonalities and inflexions than they do in English. Therefore, I listen carefully to the Spanish accent of words and am conscious to avoid an unyielding British English accent which would ruin my mission.I would love to know that in due course, I could land in Spain and confidently hold conversations there which would not need me to resort to Google Translate or a local who is fluent in English. I know a native Spaniard would most likely be humoured by my attempts to speak Spanish but that does not deter me to persevere. I have gone beyond feeling inhibited by other people’s opinions.
So, why have I chosen a language to learn of all things? It stems from a desire to do something different out of my comfort zone and the promise to myself to realise new potential. I may never need to use Spanish more than just going on holiday there. However, I have a passion for life that I haven’t had before. My subconscious mind will always remind me of the finite time ahead. That is definitely a huge impetus. Maybe this new project is also an opportunity to prove to myself that “I can.” It is also a long-term project – not some frivolous hobby born out of boredom.
Although I have mentioned this so many times before, it’s worth saying it again: a post-divorce life has granted me a liberation but not of a decadent kind. I am not searching for meaningless or trivial pursuits which do nothing to enrich me. My new life has offered me unimaginable hope and energy to go and seek new goals and know that if Allah wishes for these dreams to be realised, then there is simply nobody who can hold me back. The only time I wish to make reference to a life that is measured from the moment of my divorce is to acknowledge how infinitely grateful I am for my new circumstances. Alhamdulillah.
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